Category Archives: Thoughts On Life

Blessings

Thoughts On Life,

Clay Art-Heart

Blessings are all around us, we just have to be aware of them.

My coworker flipped his calendar to November and it is still October. You may wonder how this could possibly be a blessing. Maybe I’ve just lost it? I think not. (At least not because of this!) The calendar has people, organizations, or groups to pray for each day.  And a monthly picture of someone in need of prayer. It is quite a worthy calendar. I appreciate this calendar.

However the picture for October was of someone undergoing some type of water torture. I suspect it was water boarding but I am not knowledgeable about such things. The picture was unpleasant and I walked by it every time I left my desk. One day last week I peeked at the photo for November and commented, “Oh good, the photo for next month is not as distressing” and gave a little chuckle.

This week, with an entire week of October remaining, I notice that the calendar is flipped to November. It was not pointed out to me, just done as a kind gesture.

To be sure, the poor gentleman on the calendar was worthy of needing prayers. I just happen to be sensitive to these kinds of things and they become imprinted on my mind.

What a blessing to have such a compassionate, caring office mate. May God bless him, as well as the gentleman in the photograph, and his tormenters.

Peace Be With You

Dogs & Other Animals, Thoughts On Life, ,

Dog-Greyhound, Friends

I was just reading something that was written by Jane Goodall, of whom I am a big fan. She stated that she was born loving animals. No wonder I am a big fan. I can relate to this and understand it completely.

One of the first tv shows that I can remember watching is Captain Kangaroo. My favorite character? Mr. Moose. My favorite Saturday morning cartoon? Tarzan. I didn’t want to be Jane, I wanted to be Tarzan because he could talk to the animals. My favorite superhero? Aquaman. Because he could summon the animals for help, under water no less! Seeing a theme here?

Growing up I always had my own dog, independent from my dad’s hunting dogs. I used to beg my mom to let me bring her in the house. My mom just told me that dogs didn’t belong inside and that when I grew up and had my own house, I could have all the dogs I wanted in it. I don’t think it is physically possible, or wise, for me to have as many as I want. But we do tend to vary between 4 to 6 or 7 dogs at any one time, depending on the number of foster and visiting dogs residing with us. Not to mention the cats, current count is four.

For years now, instead of killing spiders, moths, etc. in the house, I try to catch them and release them outside. We try to live trap destructive rodents and release them elsewhere. I don’t like to kill things or being responsible for killing them if there is another option.

I don’t remember ever not being this way. I don’t understand people who don’t like animals. Animals are fellow beings on this planet with us. I tend to look at these people with puzzlement and realize that we are never likely to more than acquaintances because they don’t “get” what is my biggest passion in life. I wouldn’t say that I love animals more than humans. We are all living beings and deserve respect. Loving one does not exclude the other. Although I must say, I am often more comfortable around animals than people.

Peace be with you. And all forms of life.

Cycles of Life

Thoughts On Life, ,

Life changes no matter what. There are ups and there are downs always. Hang in there the bad times are temporary. Cherish the good times because they are not guaranteed. 

I have survived some hard times in recent months. The death of three very close friends and the death of our beloved greyhound along with other life turmoils.

Now come the good times. Things are definitely looking good. A recent promotion at work, a new greyhound arriving next week, and a long holiday weekend with lots of time to spend with family. 

This is the reward. Life is good!

Making Memories, Do It Now

Thoughts On Life, ,
Daughters
My daughter, that I dearly love spending time with, and me.

I have been spending some time in contemplation lately. What is really important in life? Making the world a better place and improving the conditions of living things certainly is up there. That goes without saying.

I have begun to realize though that making time to spend with those you love is much more important than I have given it credit for in the past. We go about our busy daily lives. There is always more to do. We tend to take our loved ones for granted. I’ll spend time with them next week. I’ll make the trip to see my dear friend next month. Often, when next week or next month arrives, we say, ok I’ll really go see them next week or month. And so on. We think that we will always have another opportunity to see them. This may not be true.

Making memories with my grandchildren at Lake Erie
Making memories with my grandchildren at Lake Erie

This fact has been becoming more plain to me and the point was really driven home last night. I went to calling hours for a friend’s daughter. The daughter was only 30 years old and succumbed to a short term battle with breast cancer. The funeral home was full of people who were stunned that this young, beautiful, successful lady was taken from them with so little warning. The father said to me, take the time to make those memories. It is important to spend time together, be there for each other, and spend time making the fun and meaningful memories too. Then we will have something to cherish and hold near to our hearts.

My niece training Nikki
Spending time showing my niece how to train Nikki

I have lost a number of people who where close to me in the last year. There is not one of them that I don’t wish I had spent more time with. I have learned. In the future I will try more often to spend time with people. I may not have the chance again.

The Gift, aka Encounter with the Ex’s Wife

Thoughts On Life, ,

Garden gate, flowers

I had the most wonderful experience this past weekend at a post funeral dinner. The funeral was for my one time mother-in-law (MIL), and forever mom and friend. The service was beautifully orchestrated by the aforementioned MIL. It was a fine send off, with some tears, and a whole lot of celebration of her life.  And there was a lot to celebrate.

Afterwards, there was “the Luncheon”. This was a somewhat uncertain event for me because it would be the first encounter with my ex-husband since our divorce some 17 years previously. And calculating out just how long it had actually been, makes me wonder why I gave it any credence at all. That is one heck of a long time!

I have remained family and friends with the ex-husband’s relatives over these many years. They continued to play an important part in my life, even becoming friends with my new husband. This was as it should be. I got divorced from one person, not a family.

There were some minor concerns in my mind about how the whole day would go. I didn’t know how my reception would from my ex and his current wife. Over the years I had thought there were some negative thoughts and impressions of me, and no doubt at some point there were. That would be natural and expected.

However, at “the Luncheon” my ex’s wife approached me with something to say. And what she had to say was this, which I will paraphrase. “Thank you for coming. It was very kind of you to come. Insert MIL’s name, loved you and she would be happy that you are here.” There were a few other pleasantries of a similar nature passed back and forth but this was the crux of it.

I can’t think of a more kind, compassionate, heartfelt gesture she could have made. This was a true gift. I didn’t have to wonder any more how things would go. What a special person she has proven herself to be.

I take a lesson from this encounter. Be kind. Always. It makes the world a better place.

Looking Back, Looking Forward

Thoughts On Life, , ,
Friends
Me and my friend Becky in Bar Harbor, Maine, 1998.

The last year has been quite a time of change and loss for me. Last June my mother died. Two of my very close, dear friends died of cancer related illnesses, one in March and one in May of this year. In June we lost our beloved greyhound, Phoebe, to a traumatic injury as a result of cancer. And yesterday my one-time mother-in-law, and always mother, left this earth.

For a while I was feeling very mortal, not to mention old. I dare say I was somewhat depressed. This seems understandable considering the losses I have had to bear. Now I am reaching the point of being retrospective. I would not want any of my loved ones to continue to suffer their worldly pains and infirmities. Ok, maybe a selfish part of me wants that so I could still have them with me. But the other part of me knows that it is selfish and too much to ask. Sometimes love is letting go. At least for me.

And so it is time to reframe my outlook on life. It is time for the last pictures of me and them, taken during their end days, to come down and be replaced with pictures of us in the good times. Pictures of us living our lives and embodying the joy we shared. Pictures that embrace life! My friends and family were not their illnesses. I will honor them by remembering the love.

Family
Family-my brother, me, and my then mother-in-law at Stan Hywett in 1998

The memories and love are but one part of the experience though. The rest is what I choose to do now. My loved ones are gone. I am not. It is still my time on this earth. Time to live by one of my favorite quotes, the author is unknown to me.

“I shall pass this way but once. Therefore, any good that I can do… or any kindness that I can show-let me do it now for I shall not pass this way again.”

It is my time to show perseverance, caring, helpfulness, occasional goofiness, and undying love. I shall take the parts that they have left me and use them to help pave the way for the rest of my life. The life that is still to come. They will go with me and continue to make a difference in the world. We are but a sum of our experiences and what we choose to do with them. And my friends, I choose to go on joyfully living, taking the bits of each I have known who have gone before me, with me. Onward!

Accidentally Carefree 

Thoughts On Life, ,

I have been accused of being anal because I have a laminated list of things to take with us when we go to the beach. 

I plead guilty!  I don’t hear anyone complaining when I dig deep down into my large bag and pull out plastic ware for spreading the condiments, that I also remembered, on their sandwiches. And when they need something to put trash in so it doesn’t go blowing across the beach, I have that too. 

Carefree trips to the beach don’t happen by accident. Anal retentives rule!

All Good Things Must Come to an End 

Dogs & Other Animals, Thoughts On Life, ,

I’m not sure why all good things must come to an end but my five days off work end tomorrow. 

My employer has this silly policy whereby they expect me to report to work every so often in order to continue receiving my paycheck. I am not sure who came up with this plan but alas I will be back at my desk and working in the lab tomorrow. 

(In reality, I like my job just fine, but there are no dogs there. All things are better with dogs! )

Until We Meet Again

Thoughts On Life, ,

image

Today was the end of an era for me. My best friend from college was laid to rest. This forces the issue of mortality in my mind. Becky and I were friends for 35 years. On one hand 35 years is quite a while. On the other hand I did not have her in my life for nearly long enough. In another 35 years I will be close to 90 years old. I guess it just points out that we need to make the most of our times together.

And Becky and I did have some most awesome times! The picture above is from our trip to Maine, most of which was spent in Bar Harbor and Acadia National Park. We hiked, we ate ice cream and lobster, we shopped, camped, went to the beach, and hiked some more. We discovered on this trip that I can make a 180 degree turn in a full size pickup when I see an ice cream stand! Totally worth it. Becky laughed about that for years.

image

This picture is from our hike to the summit of Gorham Mountain. We were quite proud. Although this trip is one of the highlights of our adventures, there were so many more.

Our group of college friends had annual Christmas parties, even as families grew. Becky spent many, many weekends with me when we were both single. Through all the years and life changes we always kept in contact. At some points more often than others. It was always as if no time had passed when we got together again.

I’m sure that will be the case when some day in the distant future we are hanging out together again. Becky will live on as a part of me. Just like a quote I saw somewhere. Death ends a life, not a relationship. Until we meet again my friend.

Qualifications?

About, Dogs & Other Animals, Thoughts On Life, ,

image

I was reviewing my notes from when I started this blog. One of the bits of advice was to let the audience know your qualifications. Hmmm, I need qualifications so people will listen to me spout random thoughts and ideas? Apparently so. Well, since the majority of my musings have something to do with dogs, I will provide my “dog” résumé. This the résumé I had to provide when I applied to be an evaluator for therapy dogs.

image

I did update it to be current. To be honest, I am more proud of this than my professional work résumé. It is a summary of what I am passionate about. It makes me think of a quote I saw on Facebook recently. “I don’t always talk about dogs…sometimes I’m asleep.” Guilty as charged. But proud of it.